Difficult conversations in the workplace


Do you need to have a difficult conversation with an employee and aren‚Äôt sure how?  As an employer or manager, it is likely that you will need to have a difficult conversation with an employee at some stage. The Fair Work Ombudsman has some excellent tips on how to do this well.

Examples of the types of conversation you may need to have are:
‚Ä¢    communicating tough business decisions, such as denying a leave request or a pay rise to your employees
‚Ä¢    giving bad news, such as ending employment or advising unsuccessful job applicants
‚Ä¢    discussing poor performance or behaviour
‚Ä¢    dealing with complaints and grievances.

In the workplace, the best way to handle an issue is not to ignore it or sweep it under the rug, but to deal with it promptly. If this is handled well, this can have the effect of lifting employee performance and engagement, and improving relationships in your workplace.

Generally, workplace issues will not just disappear. If ignored or avoided, you may find the problem can become worse, can potentially damage the productivity and efficiency of the business, can reduce staff engagement and ultimately lead to higher absenteeism and employee turnover.

Here are a few handy tips if you need to have a difficult conversation in your workplace.

1. Prepare for the conversation.

  • Write down the key points you need to cover
  • Think about your desired outcome and think about whether it is realistic.
  • Check your facts and gather any documents you need, have examples/copies to hand.
  • Arrange a time and private place to speak with the employee, and let them know what the conversation will be about so they have time to prepare too.
  • Let the employee bring a support person if they want to.

 2. The conversation itself

  • Start by explaining the situation clearly, based on the facts. State the problem or issue at the beginning of the conversation.
  • Avoid unnecessary small talk.
  • Stick to the facts, rather than opinions, and give examples where possible.
  • Importantly, ensure you explain the impact that the issue or their behaviour is having on the business or team.
  • Focus on the issue, not the person. It helps if you use words like ‘the behaviour’, ‘the situation’, rather than ‘you’.

 3. Ask the Employee for input

  • Invite the employee to share their point of view and listen to what they have to say.
  • Even if you’re convinced that you’re right, try to keep an open mind – there may be other issues or facts you don’t know.
  • Always acknowledge the employee’s feelings and be willing to consider an alternate solution.

4. Manage your emotions and remain calm.

  • Be rational and objective. Being angry or defensive won’t help to resolve the issue.
  • Always ensure that you stay calm, talk slowly, at an even tone and volume, be clear and concise and focus on the issue, not your feelings or the person involved.

 5. Help the employee manage their emotions.

  • In these situations, the employee often reacts emotionally. It’s important not to make a promise you can’t fulfil to diffuse the employee’s emotional reaction.
  • Listen and show genuine interest in what the employee has to say. This may involve expressing support or reassurance where you can (eg. ‘I can see this is hard for you’ or ‘It’s ok to be upset about this’), or apologising if appropriate (eg. ‘I’m sorry but I can’t grant your request’).

 6. Reach an agreement on how to move forward and close the conversation.

  • Close the conversation by agreeing on action points and next steps.
  • Gain the employee’s commitment to the agreed actions. You can do this by asking questions like ‘how do you feel about that?’ or ‘What do you think about this way forward?’
  • Set a follow up date. This will allow you to check if the agreed steps have been taken and see whether the employee needs any further support or assistance.
  • Thank the employee for listening and openly discussing the issue.

7. Follow up.

  • Ensure you fully document the discussion and any agreements you have made.
  • Maintain a professional relationship and keep communication lines open with the employee.
  • Follow through with the agreed actions and follow up with the employee to make sure the issue has been resolved.

If you or your employees could benefit from coaching on how to successfully hold ‘difficult conversations’ contact Annette at End2End Business Solutions on (02) 8977 4002 or by email. We can structure a program specifically for your workplace to give you and your employees the skills to successfully communicate the difficult conversations.